Once Again Look Back at the Information Show in Question 1
Affiliate 12. Peer Review and Final Revisions
12.1 Revision
Learning Objectives
- Identify major areas of business organization in the draft essay during revising
- Use peer reviews and checklists to assist revising
- Revise your newspaper to improve system and cohesion
- Determine an appropriate style and tone for your newspaper
- Revise to ensure that your tone is consequent
- Revise the starting time draft of your essay and produce a final draft
Revising and editing are the 2 tasks you undertake to significantly improve your essay. Both are very important elements of the writing procedure. You may think that a completed kickoff typhoon ways that little improvement is needed. Nonetheless, even experienced writers need to better their drafts and rely on peers during revising and editing. Y'all may know that athletes miss catches, fumble balls, or overshoot goals. Dancers forget steps, turn also slowly, or miss beats. For both athletes and dancers, the more they practise, the stronger their performance will become. Web designers seek better images, a more clever pattern, or a more appealing background for their web pages. Writing has the same capacity to profit from comeback and revision.
You lot should revise and edit in stages: exercise not expect to catch everything in ane go. If each time you review your essay you focus on a different aspect of construction, you will be more probable to catch any mistakes or place any issues. Throughout this chapter, you volition see a number of checklists containing specific things to look for with each revision. For example, you will outset expect at how the overall paper and your ideas are organized.
In the second section of this chapter, you will focus more on editing: correcting the mechanical issues. Also at the end of the chapter, you will see a comprehensive just more general list of things you should be looking for.
Understanding the Purpose of Revising and Editing
Revising and editing allow you to examine 2 important aspects of your writing separately, so that you lot can give each job your undivided attending.
When you revise , you have a 2nd look at your ideas. You might add together, cutting, move, or change information in order to make your ideas clearer, more than accurate, more interesting, or more disarming.
When you edit , you take a 2nd await at how you expressed your ideas. You lot add or change words. You gear up any bug in grammar, punctuation, and judgement construction. You improve your writing style. Yous brand your essay into a polished, mature slice of writing, the end production of your best efforts.
Tip
How do you lot get the best out of your revisions and editing? Here are some strategies that writers have developed to look at their starting time drafts from a fresh perspective. Try them throughout the writing process; then keep using the ones that bring results.
Take a break. You lot are proud of what you wrote, but you might exist likewise close to it to make changes. Set bated your writing for a few hours or even a day until y'all tin expect at it objectively.
Ask someone you trust for feedback and constructive criticism.
Pretend you are one of your readers. Are you satisfied or dissatisfied? Why?
For many people, the wordscritic,disquisitional, andcriticism provoke only negative feelings that make them blush, grumble, or shout. However, as a writer and a thinker, you need to learn to be disquisitional of yourself in a positive way and have high expectations for your work. Yous too demand to train your eye and trust your ability to fix what needs fixing. To exercise this, you demand to teach yourself where to wait.
Revising Your Paper: Organization , Cohesion , and Unity
When writing a research paper, it is easy to become overly focused on editorial details, such as the proper format for bibliographical entries. These details do matter. However, earlier y'all brainstorm to accost them, it is important to spend fourth dimension reviewing and revising the content of the paper.
A proficient research paper is both organized and cohesive.Organization means that your statement flows logically from one point to the next.Cohesion means that the elements of your newspaper piece of work together smoothly and naturally. In a cohesive research paper, information from research is seamlessly integrated with the writer'south ideas.
Revise to Improve Organization
When yous revise to improve organization, you look at the catamenia of ideas throughout the essay as a whole and within individual paragraphs. You check to meet that your essay moves logically from the introduction to the body paragraphs to the conclusion, and that each section reinforces your thesis. Use Checklist 12.1 : Revise for Organization to help y'all.
Checklist 12.one : Revise for Organisation
At the essay level
Does my introduction proceed clearly from the opening to the thesis?
Does each torso paragraph take a clear main idea that relates to the thesis?
Do the main ideas in the body paragraphs flow in a logical gild? Is each paragraph connected to the one before it?
Do I need to add or revise topic sentences or transitions to make the overall flow of ideas clearer?
Does my conclusion summarize my primary ideas and revisit my thesis?
At the paragraph level
Does the topic sentence clearly land the master idea?
Do the details in the paragraph relate to the principal idea?
Do I need to recast any sentences or add transitions to ameliorate the flow of sentences?
Jorge reread his draft paragraph by paragraph. As he read, he highlighted the main thought of each paragraph and then he could see whether his ideas proceeded in a logical order. For the most part, the flow of ideas was clear. However, he did detect that i paragraph did not have a clear principal idea. Information technology interrupted the flow of the writing. During revision, Jorge added a topic sentence that clearly connected the paragraph to the one that had preceded information technology. He also added transitions to improve the menses of ideas from judgement to sentence.
Read the following paragraphs twice, the outset time without Jorge's changes, and the second time with them.
Self – practice EXERCISE 12.one
Follow these steps to begin revising your paper's overall organization.
Print out a hard copy of your paper. (You lot will utilise this for multiple cocky-exercise exercises in this chapter.)
Read your paper paragraph by paragraph. Highlight your thesis and the topic sentence of each paragraph.
Using the thesis and topic sentences as starting points, outline the ideas you presented—just equally you would do if yous were outlining a chapter in a textbook. Do not look at the outline you created during prewriting. Yous may write in the margins of your draft or create a formal outline on a split sheet of paper.
Next, reread your paper more slowly, looking for how ideas flow from sentence to sentence. Place places where adding a transition or recasting a sentence would make the ideas flow more than logically.
Review the topics on your outline. Is in that location a logical flow of ideas? Identify whatever places where you may demand to reorganize ideas.
Brainstorm to revise your newspaper to improve organization. Start with any major issues, such as needing to move an entire paragraph. And so proceed to minor revisions, such every bit adding a transitional phrase or tweaking a topic sentence so information technology connects ideas more clearly.
Optional collaboration: P lease share your paper with a classmate. Repeat the six steps and have notes on a divide slice of paper. Share and compare notes.
Tip
Writers choose transitions carefully to show the relationships between ideas—for instance, to make a comparison or elaborate on a indicate with examples. Make certain your transitions suit your purpose and avoid overusing the same ones.
Creating Coherence
Careful writers utilise transitions to clarify how the ideas in their sentences and paragraphs are related. These words and phrases help the writing flow smoothly. Adding transitions is not the just way to improve coherence, but they are oft useful and requite a mature feel to your essays. Earlier capacity accept discussed using transitions for specific purposes in the planning of your writing.Table 12.1: Common Transitional Words and Phrases groups many mutual transitions according to their purpose.
Table 12.1: Common Transitional Words and Phrases According to Purpose
Transitions That Show Sequence or Time | ||
after | earlier | afterward |
afterward | before long | meanwhile |
as soon as | finally | next |
at first | first, second, 3rd | soon |
at last | in the beginning place | and so |
Transitions That Show Position | ||
above | across | at the bottom |
at the top | backside | beneath |
abreast | beyond | within |
near | next to | reverse |
to the left, to the right, to the side | nether | where |
Transitions That Show a Conclusion | ||
indeed | hence | in conclusion |
in the terminal analysis | therefore | thus |
Transitions That Go on a Line of Thought | ||
consequently | furthermore | additionally |
because | too the fact | following this idea further |
in addition | in the same way | moreover |
looking further | considering…, it is clear that | |
Transitions That Change a Line of Idea | ||
but | yet | all the same |
nevertheless | on the contrary | on the other hand |
Transitions That Show Importance | ||
above all | all-time | especially |
in fact | more of import | >nearly of import |
most | worst | |
Transitions That Introduce the Final Thoughts in a Paragraph or Essay | ||
finally | last | in determination |
virtually of all | least of all | last of all |
All Purpose Transitions to Open up Paragraphs or to Connect Ideas Inside Paragraphs | ||
admittedly | at this point | certainly |
granted | it is truthful | mostly speaking |
in general | in this state of affairs | no doubtfulness |
no one denies | patently | of grade |
to be sure | undoubtedly | unquestionably |
Transitions that Introduce Examples | ||
for instance | for example | such as |
Transitions That Clarify the Order of Events or Steps | ||
first, 2nd, third | mostly, furthermore, finally | in the first identify, likewise, last |
in the first place, furthermore, finally | in the first place, likewise, lastly | |
When Mariah (who you were introduced to in Chapters five and 6) revised her essay for unity, she examined her paragraph about televisions to bank check for coherence. She looked for places where she needed to add a transition or perhaps reword the text to make the period of ideas clear. In the version that follows, she has already deleted the sentences that were off topic.
Tip
Many writers make their revisions on a printed re-create and so transfer them to the version on screen. They conventionally use a minor arrow called a caret (^) to show where to insert an improver or correction.
Cocky – practice Practice 12.2
Answer the following questions about Mariah's revised paragraph.
Do you agree with the transitions and other changes that Mariah made to her paragraph? Which would y'all keep and which were unnecessary? Explicate.
What transition words or phrases did Mariah add to her paragraph? Why did she choose each ane?
What result does adding additional sentences take on the coherence of the paragraph? Explain. When you read both versions aloud, which version has a more logical flow of ideas? Explain.
Revise to Meliorate Cohesion
When you revise to better cohesion, you clarify how the parts of your paper work together. You wait for anything that seems awkward or out of place. Revision may involve deleting unnecessary material or rewriting parts of the paper so that the out of place textile fits in smoothly.
In a research newspaper, problems with cohesion usually occur when a writer has trouble integrating source material. If facts or quotations have been awkwardly dropped into a paragraph, they distract or confuse the reader instead of working to back up the writer'southward betoken. Overusing paraphrased and quoted textile has the same effect. Use Checklist 12.2 : Revise for Cohesion to review your essay for cohesion.
Checklist 12.2 : Revise for Cohesion
Does the opening of the paper clearly connect to the broader topic and thesis? Make sure entertaining quotes or anecdotes serve a purpose.
Have I included support from inquiry for each chief point in the body of my paper?
Accept I included introductory fabric before any quotations? Quotations should never stand lonely in a paragraph.
Does paraphrased and quoted material clearly serve to develop my own points?
Do I need to add together to or revise parts of the paper to aid the reader understand how certain information from a source is relevant?
Are in that location whatsoever places where I have overused cloth from sources?
Does my conclusion brand sense based on the balance of the paper? Brand sure any new questions or suggestions in the conclusion are clearly linked to before material.
As Jorge reread his draft, he looked to encounter how the different pieces fit together to bear witness his thesis. He realized that some of his supporting information needed to be integrated more advisedly and decided to omit some details entirely. Read the following paragraph, first without Jorge's revisions and and then with them.
Jorge decided that his comment near pizza and altogether cake came across every bit subjective and was not necessary to brand his betoken, so he deleted it. He also realized that the quotation at the terminate of the paragraph was awkward and ineffective. How would his readers know who Kwon was or why her opinion should exist taken seriously? Adding an introductory phrase helped Jorge integrate this quotation smoothly and establish the credibility of his source.
Self – practice Practice 12.iii
Follow these steps to begin revising your paper to better cohesion.
Print out a hard copy of your paper, or work with your printout fromSelf – Practice Exercise 12.1.
Read the body paragraphs of your newspaper first. Each fourth dimension you come to a identify that cites information from sources, ask yourself what purpose this information serves. Check that it helps support a bespeak and that it is clearly related to the other sentences in the paragraph.
Identify unnecessary data from sources that you tin can delete.
Identify places where you demand to revise your writing so that readers sympathise the significance of the details cited from sources.
Skim the body paragraphs once again, looking for any paragraphs that seem packed with citations. Review these paragraphs carefully for cohesion.
Review your introduction and determination. Make sure the information presented works with ideas in the torso of the newspaper.
Revise the places y'all identified in your paper to meliorate cohesion.
Optional c ollaboration: P lease commutation papers with a classmate. Complete pace 4 . On a split up slice of paper, note whatever areas that would benefit from description. Return and compare notes.
Writing at Piece of work
Understanding cohesion tin also benefit you in the workplace, especially when you have to write and deliver a presentation. Speakers sometimes rely on cute graphics or funny quotations to agree their audition's attention. If y'all choose to utilize these elements, make certain they work well with the substantive content of your presentation. For instance, if y'all are asked to requite a fiscal presentation, and the fiscal report shows that the company lost money, funny illustrations would not be relevant or appropriate for the presentation.
Tip
Reading your writing aloud will ofttimes help you detect problems with unity and coherence. Heed for the clarity and flow of your ideas. Identify places where you detect yourself confused, and write a notation to yourself nigh possible fixes.
Creating Unity
Sometimes writers get caught up in the moment and cannot resist a adept digression. Even though you might enjoy such detours when you chat with friends, unplanned digressions commonly impairment a piece of writing.
Post-obit your outline closely offers you a reasonable guarantee that your writing will stay on purpose and non drift away from the decision-making thought. However, when writers are rushed, are tired, or cannot detect the right words, their writing may become less than they want it to exist. Their writing may no longer exist clear and concise, and they may add information that is not needed to develop the chief idea.
When a piece of writing hasunity, all the ideas in each paragraph and in the unabridged essay clearly belong and are arranged in an order that makes logical sense. When the writing hascoherence, the ideas period smoothly. The diction clearly indicates how ane idea leads to another within a paragraph and from paragraph to paragraph.
Mariah stayed close to her outline when she drafted the three torso paragraphs of her essay she tentatively titled "Digital Technology: The Newest and the All-time at What Price?" Only a recent shopping trip for an HDTV upset her enough that she digressed from the main topic of her third paragraph and included comments well-nigh the sales staff at the electronics store she visited. When she revised her essay, she deleted the off-topic sentences that affected the unity of the paragraph.
Read the post-obit paragraph twice, the first time without Mariah's changes and the second time with them.
Self – practice Practice 12.iv
Answer the following two questions about Mariah's paragraph:
Do you hold with Mariah'southward conclusion to make the deletions she fabricated? Did she cut too much, likewise piddling, or but plenty? Explain.
Is the explanation of what screen resolution means a digression? Or is it audition friendly and essential to understanding the paragraph? Explicate.
Collaboration: P charter share with a classmate and compare your answers.
At present, print out another copy of your essay or use the printed version(s) yous used in Self – Practice Exercises 12.1 and 12.3 . Reread information technology to find whatever statements that affect the unity of your writing. Decide how best to revise.
Tip
When y'all reread your writing to observe revisions to make, await for each type of trouble in a separate sweep. Read information technology straight through in one case to locate whatever problems with unity. Read it straight through a second time to find problems with coherence. Yous may follow this same practice during many stages of the writing process.
Writing at Piece of work
Many companies rent copy editors and proofreaders to help them produce the cleanest possible last drafts of big writing projects. Copy editors are responsible for suggesting revisions and style changes; proofreaders bank check documents for any errors in capitalization, spelling, and punctuation that have crept in. Many times, these tasks are done on a freelance basis, with i freelancer working for a variety of clients.
Using a Consistent Manner and Tone
Once you are certain that the content of your paper fulfills your purpose, you can begin revising to improvestyle andtone. Together, your style and tone create the voice of your newspaper, or how you come beyond to readers. Style refers to the mode you utilize language as a author—the sentence structures you apply and the discussion choices yous make. Tone is the attitude toward your subject and audition that you convey through your discussion choice.
Determining an Appropriate Manner and Tone
Although accepted writing styles will vary inside unlike disciplines, the underlying goal is the same—to come across to your readers as a knowledgeable, authoritative guide. Writing well-nigh inquiry is like being a tour guide who walks readers through a topic. A stuffy, overly formal bout guide can make readers feel put off or intimidated. Too much informality or sense of humour can make readers wonder whether the tour guide really knows what he or she is talking about. Farthermost or emotionally charged language comes across as unbalanced.
To help prevent being overly formal or informal, determine an appropriate style and tone at the beginning of the research procedure. Consider your topic and audience considering these tin can aid dictate style and tone. For example, a paper on new breakthroughs in cancer research should be more formal than a paper on ways to get a good dark'due south slumber.
A strong research newspaper comes across equally straightforward, appropriately academic, and serious. It is more often than not best to avoid writing in the first person, as this can make your paper seem overly subjective and opinion based. Use Checklist 12.3 : Revise for Fashion to review your paper for other issues that affect style and tone. You can cheque for consistency at the end of the writing procedure. Checking for consistency is discussed later in this section.
Checklist 12.3 : Revise for Style
My paper avoids excessive wordiness.
My sentences are varied in length and structure.
I have avoided using commencement person pronouns such as I and we.
I have used the agile voice whenever possible.
I have divers specialized terms that might be unfamiliar to readers.
I have used clear, straightforward language whenever possible and avoided unnecessary jargon.
My paper states my point of view using a balanced tone—neither as well indecisive nor besides forceful.
Word Selection
Notation that discussion selection is an especially important aspect of style. In addition to checking the points noted on Checklist 12.3, review your paper to brand sure your linguistic communication is precise, conveys no unintended connotations, and is costless of bias. Here are some of the points to bank check for:
Vague or imprecise terms
Slang
Repetition of the aforementioned phrases ("Smith states…, Jones states…") to introduce quoted and paraphrased material (For a total listing of strong verbs to utilize with in text citations, seeChapter 9: Citations and Referencing.)
Exclusive apply of masculine pronouns or awkward utilise ofhe or she
Use of language with negative connotations, such equally haughty or ridiculous
Utilise of outdated or offensive terms to refer to specific indigenous, racial, or religious groups
Tip
Using plural nouns and pronouns or recasting a sentence tin help you go on your language gender neutral while avoiding awkwardness. Consider the post-obit examples.
- Gender biased : When a writer cites a source in the trunk of his paper, he must listing information technology on his references page.
- Awkward : When a writer cites a source in the body of his or her paper, he or she must listing information technology on his or her references page.
- Improved : Writers must list any sources cited in the torso of a paper on the references page.
Keeping Your Style Consistent
As you revise your newspaper, brand certain your style is consistent throughout. Expect for instances where a word, phrase, or sentence does not seem to fit with the residuum of the writing. It is all-time to reread for style after y'all have completed the other revisions so that yous are not distracted by any larger content bug. Revising strategies y'all can employ include the following:
Read your paper aloud. Sometimes your ears catch inconsistencies that your eyes miss.
Share your paper with some other reader whom you lot trust to give you honest feedback. It is often difficult to evaluate one's own fashion objectively—particularly in the final phase of a challenging writing projection. Another reader may be more than probable to find instances of wordiness, confusing language, or other problems that affect style and tone.
E dit your newspaper slowly, judgement by sentence. You may even wish to utilize a canvass of newspaper to comprehend up everything on the page except the paragraph y'all are editing. This practice forces you to read slowly and advisedly. Mark whatever areas where you observe problems in manner or tone, and then take time to rework those sections.
On reviewing his paper, Jorge found that he had mostly used an accordingly academic manner and tone. However, he noticed i glaring exception—his kickoff paragraph. He realized there were places where his overly informal writing could come across every bit unserious or, worse, disparaging. Revising his word choice and omitting a humorous aside helped Jorge maintain a consistent tone. Read his revisions.
Self – practice EXERCISE 12.5
Using Checklist 12.three : Revise for Style , revise your paper line by line. You may use either of these techniques:
Print out a difficult copy of your paper or work with your printout fromCocky – Exercise Do 12.ane. Read information technology line by line. Check for the problems noted on Checklist 12.3, too as any other aspects of your writing style you have previously identified as areas for comeback. Marking any areas where you notice problems in fashion or tone, and then take time to rework those sections.
If you adopt to work with an electronic document, use the menu options in your word processing program to enlarge the text to 150 or 200 percent of the original size. Make certain the blazon is large enough that yous can focus on i paragraph at a time. Read the newspaper line by line as described in step 1. Highlight any areas where you detect problems in way or tone, and so take time to rework those sections.
Optional c ollaboration: P lease exchange papers with a classmate. On a separate piece of newspaper, annotation places where the essay does not seem to period or you have questions virtually what was written. Return the essay and compare notes.
Completing a Peer Review
Later on working so closely with a slice of writing, writers often need to pace back and inquire for a more objective reader. What writers need most is feedback from readers who tin can respond only to the words on the folio. When they are gear up, writers show their drafts to someone they respect and who tin can requite an honest response about its strengths and weaknesses.
You, too, can ask a peer to read your typhoon when it is prepare. Subsequently evaluating the feedback and assessing what is nearly helpful, the reader's feedback will assistance you when you revise your draft. This process is calledpeer review.
Y'all can piece of work with a partner in your class and identify specific means to strengthen each other'south essays. Although you may exist uncomfortable sharing your writing at starting time, call up that each writer is working toward the aforementioned goal: a final draft that fits the audience and the purpose. Maintaining a positive attitude when providing feedback volition put you and your partner at ease. The box that follows provides a useful framework for the peer review session.
Questions for Peer Review: Organization, Unity, and Coherence
Title of essay: ____________________________________________
Date: ____________________________________________
Writer'due south name: ____________________________________________
Peer reviewer'south name: _________________________________________
This essay is about____________________________________________.
Your main points in this essay are____________________________________________.
What I most liked about this essay is____________________________________________.
These iii points struck me as your strongest:
Point: ____________________________________________
Why: ____________________________________________
Signal: ____________________________________________
Why: ____________________________________________
Point: ____________________________________________
Why: ____________________________________________
These places in your essay are not articulate to me:
Where: ____________________________________________
Needs comeback because__________________________________________
Where: ____________________________________________
Needs improvement considering ____________________________________________
Where: ____________________________________________
Needs improvement because ____________________________________________
The one boosted change y'all could make that would improve this essay significantly is ____________________________________________.
Writing at Work
Ane of the reasons why give-and-take processing programs build in a reviewing feature is that work groups have get a common feature in many businesses. Writing is often collaborative, and the members of a work group and their supervisors oftentimes critique group members' work and offer feedback that will lead to a ameliorate terminal product.
Self – do EXERCISE 12.6
Exchange essays with a classmate and complete a peer review of each other'south draft in progress. Remember to requite positive feedback and to be courteous and polite in your responses. Focus on providing one positive comment and one question for more than information to the author.
Using Feedback Objectively
The purpose of peer feedback is to receive constructive criticism of your essay. Your peer reviewer is your showtime real audience, and you accept the opportunity to learn what confuses and delights a reader so that you lot can improve your work before sharing the final typhoon with a wider audition (or your intended audience).
It may not exist necessary to contain every recommendation your peer reviewer makes. However, if you start to observe a pattern in the responses you receive from peer reviewers, you might want to consider that feedback in future assignments. For example, if you lot read consistent comments virtually a need for more enquiry, then you may want to consider including more enquiry in future assignments.
Using Feedback from Multiple Sources
You might get feedback from more than one reader as you share different stages of your revised draft. In this situation, you may receive feedback from readers who do not understand the consignment or who lack your involvement with and enthusiasm for it.
You need to evaluate the responses you receive according to two of import criteria:
Determine if the feedback supports the purpose of the assignment.
Determine if the suggested revisions are appropriate to the audience.
And then, using these standards, accept or pass up revision feedback.
Self – practice EXERCISE 12.7
Consider the feedback yous received from the peer review and all of the revision exercises throughout this section. Compile a final draft of your revisions that you tin apply in the side by side section to complete your last edits.
Key Takeaways
- Revising and editing are the stages of the writing process in which you improve your work before producing a last draft.
- Unity in writing means that all the ideas in each paragraph and in the entire essay conspicuously belong together and are arranged in an order that makes logical sense.
- Coherence in writing means that the writer'southward wording clearly indicates how ane idea leads to another inside a paragraph and between paragraphs.
- Transitional words and phrases effectively make writing more coherent.
- Writing should exist articulate and curtailed, with no unnecessary words.
- Effective formal writing uses specific, appropriate words and avoids slang, contractions, clichés, and overly full general words.
- Peer reviews, done properly, tin can give writers objective feedback nearly their writing. It is the writer's responsibility to evaluate the results of peer reviews and incorporate only useful feedback.
12.two Editing and Developing a Final Typhoon of a Research Newspaper
Learning Objectives
- Edit your paper to ensure that linguistic communication, citations, and formatting are correct
Given all the time and effort yous have put into your enquiry paper, you will want to make certain that your final typhoon represents your best work. This requires taking the time to revise and edit your paper carefully.
Y'all may feel like you need a break from your paper before y'all edit it. That feeling is understandable, so you desire to be sure to leave yourself plenty time to consummate this important stage of the writing procedure. This section presents a number of opportunities for you to focus on different aspects of the editing process; as with revising a draft, you lot should approach editing in different stages.
Some of the content in this department may seem repetitive, just again, it provides you with a chance to double-cheque any revisions yous have fabricated at a detailed level.
Editing Your Draft
If you take been incorporating each gear up of revisions as Mariah and Jorge have, you have produced multiple drafts of your writing. So far, all your changes have been content changes. Perhaps with the help of peer feedback, you have fabricated certain that you sufficiently supported your ideas. You have checked for bug with unity and coherence. You have examined your essay for discussion choice, revising to cut unnecessary words and to supersede weak wording with specific and appropriate wording.
The side by side step later revising the content is editing. When y'all edit, you examine the surface features of your text. You lot examine your spelling, grammer, usage, and punctuation. You likewise brand sure you use the proper format when creating your finished consignment.
Tip
Editing takes time. Be sure to upkeep fourth dimension into the writing process to complete additional edits afterward revising. Editing and proofreading your writing helps you lot create a finished work that represents your best efforts. Here are a few more tips to remember nearly your readers:
Readers do not notice correct spelling, merely theydo notice misspellings.
Readers look past your sentences to get to your ideas—unless the sentences are bad-mannered, poorly synthetic, and frustrating to read.
Readers discover when every judgement has the same rhythm as every other judgement, with no diversity.
Readers exercise not cheer when y'all utilizethere,their, andthey're correctly, only they discover when you do not.
Readers will discover the care with which you handled your assignment and your attending to detail in the delivery of an error-free document.
Being Articulate and Concise
Some writers are very methodical and painstaking when they write a first draft. Other writers unleash a lot of words in order to get out all that they feel they need to say. Do either of these methods match your style? Or is your composing style somewhere in betwixt? No matter which description best fits you, the first draft of nearly every piece of writing, no matter its writer, can be made clearer and more concise.
If you have a tendency to write too much, you volition need to look for unnecessary words. If you have a trend to be vague or imprecise in your diction, you lot will need to detect specific words to replace any overly general language.
Identifying Wordiness
Sometimes writers use too many words when fewer words will entreatment more than to their audience and better fit their purpose. Here are some common examples of wordiness to look for in your draft. Eliminating wordiness helps all readers, because information technology makes your ideas clear, direct, and straightforward.
- Sentences that begin withThere isorThere are
- Wordy . In that location are two major experiments that the Biology Department sponsors.
- Revised . The Biological science Department sponsors two major experiments.
- Sentences with unnecessary modifiers
- Wordy . Two extremely famous and well-known consumer advocates spoke eloquently in favour of the proposed of import legislation.
- Revised . Two well-known consumer advocates spoke in favour of the proposed legislation.
Sentences with deadwood phrases that add petty to the meaning. Be judicious when you utilize phrases such asin terms of,with a listen to,on the subject of,as to whether or not,more or less,as far equally…is concerned, and similar expressions. You lot can unremarkably find a more straightforward mode to country your point.
- Wordy . As a world leader in the field of green engineering, the company plans to focus its efforts in the area of geothermal free energy. A report as to whether or not to use geysers as an energy source is in the process of training.
- Revised . As a earth leader in green technology, the company plans to focus on geothermal energy. Researchers are preparing a report well-nigh using geysers as an free energy source.
Sentences in the passive voice or with forms of the verbto exist : Due southentences with passive vocalisation verbs frequently create defoliation because the bailiwick of the sentence does not perform an action. Sentences are clearer when the discipline performs the action and is followed by a strong verb. Use stiff agile voice verbs in place of forms ofto be, which can lead to wordiness. Avoid passive voice when yous can.
- Wordy . Information technology might maybe be said that using a GPS device is something that is a benefit to drivers who have a poor sense of direction.
- Revised . Using a GPS device benefits drivers who accept a poor sense of direction.
Sentences with constructions that tin can be shortened
- Wordy . The e-book reader, which is a recent invention, may get as commonplace every bit the jail cell phone. My over-60 uncle bought an eastward-volume reader, and his wife bought an due east-book reader, too.
- Revised . The e-volume reader, a recent invention, may get as commonplace as the prison cell telephone. My over-60 uncle and his wife both bought e-book readers.
Choosing Specific, Advisable Words
Most essays at the post-secondary level should be written in formal English suitable for an academic situation. Follow these principles to exist sure that your word choice is appropriate. For more than information nearly word option, come acrossChapter 2: Working with Words: Which Give-and-take Is Right?
Avert slang . Find alternatives tobummer,kewl, andrad.
Avoid language that is overly casual . Write about "men and women" rather than "girls and guys" unless you are trying to create a specific effect. A formal tone calls for formal language.
Avoid contractions . Usedo non in place ofdon't,I am in place ofI'm,have non in identify ofhaven't, and and then on. Contractions are considered casual speech.
Avoid clichés . Overused expressions such equallygreen with envy,confront the music,better late than never, and similar expressions are empty of meaning and may not appeal to your audience.
Be careful when you lot use words that sound alike but take dissimilar meanings . Some examples areallusion/illusion; complement/compliment; quango/counsel; concurrent/consecutive; founder/flounder; and historic/historical. When in doubt, bank check a dictionary.
Choose words with the connotations you want . Choosing a give-and-take for its connotations is as important in formal essay writing as it is in all kinds of writing. Compare the positive connotations of the wordproud and the negative connotations ofbig-headed andconceited.
Apply specific words rather than overly general words . Find synonyms formatter,people,nice,good,bad,interesting, and other vague words. Or use specific details to make your exact pregnant clear.
Now read the revisions Mariah made to make her third paragraph clearer and more concise. She has already incorporated the changes she fabricated to better unity and coherence.
Self – practice Practice 12.8
Respond the following questions almost Mariah's revised paragraph:
Read the unrevised and the revised paragraphs aloud. Explain in your ain words how changes in word choice take affected Mariah's writing.
Do y'all concur with the changes that Mariah made to her paragraph? Which changes would you keep and which were unnecessary? Explain. What other changes would you lot have made?
What effect does removing contractions and the pronoun yous have on the tone of the paragraph? How would y'all narrate the tone now? Why?
At present return once more to your essay in progress. Read advisedly for problems with word option. Be sure that your typhoon is written in formal linguistic communication and that your give-and-take choice is specific and advisable.
Cocky – practice EXERCISE 12.ix
R eturn again to the first typhoon of the essay y'all take been revising. Bank check it for unnecessary words.
Try making your sentences equally curtailed equally they can exist.
Brief Punctuation Review
Throughout this book, you have been presented with a number of tables containing transitional words. Table 12.2: Punctuating Transitional Words and Phrases shows many of the transition words you lot accept seen organized into different categories to help you know how to punctuate with each one.
Table 12.ii: Punctuating Transitional Words and Phrases
Joining Contained Clauses (coordination) | ||||||
2 IND | Analogous conjunctions: FANBOYS | Conjunctive adverbs and other transitional expressions | ||||
IND ; IND | IND , ____ IND | IND . _____, IND or IND ; _____, IND | ||||
for | appropriately | later on all | ||||
and | after a while | also | ||||
nor | anyhow | every bit a result | ||||
only | at any charge per unit | at the aforementioned fourth dimension | ||||
or | besides | consequently | ||||
yet | for instance | for example | ||||
so | furthermore | hence | ||||
henceforth | however | |||||
in add-on | indeed | |||||
in fact | in other words | |||||
in detail | instead | |||||
in the start place | likewise | |||||
meanwhile | moreover | |||||
still | nonetheless | |||||
on the reverse | on the other paw | |||||
otherwise | notwithstanding | |||||
and so | therefore | |||||
thus | ||||||
Forming Dependent Clauses (subordination) | ||||||
IND + DEP or DEP , IND | ||||||
afterward | although | equally | equally if | as though | ||
because | before | if | in order that | since | ||
so that | that | though | unless | until | ||
when | whenever | where | wherever | |||
*which | while | who | whom | whose | ||
* This row contains relative pronouns, which may be punctuated differently.
Joining Independent Clauses
There are 3 ways to join independent clauses. By using a mix of all three methods and varying your transition words, you will add complexity to your writing and meliorate the catamenia. Yous will as well be emphasizing to your reader which ideas you want to connect or to show things like crusade and effect or dissimilarity. For a more detailed review of independent clauses, look back at Chapter 3: Putting Ideas into Your Own Words and Paragraphs. Option 1 Past simply using a semicolon (;), you tin make the ideas connect more than than if you were to employ a period. If you lot are trying to reinforce that connexion, use a semicolon because it is not every bit strong of a interruption as a catamenia and reinforces the link. Selection 2 When you want to link two independent sentences and increase the menstruation between ideas, y'all tin add together a comma and a coordinating conjunction between them. With coordinating conjunctions (FANBOYS: for, and, nor, but, or, yet, so), yous do non use a comma every fourth dimension: yous would only practise so if what is on either side of the conjunction is a consummate sentence not just a phrase. Yous would non put a comma if you are only giving a list of two items. For example:
Comma:Information technology is cold outside, and so I wore an extra warm coat.
No comma: It is common cold outside. I wore an actress warm coat and gloves.
The outset example contains a complete sentence (independent clause) on either side of the conjunction so. Just the conjunction by itself or just a comma by itself is not strong plenty to join two independent clauses. However, if you put the two together with and so, you tin link the two. In the second example, and is just connecting ii noun phrases: warm coat and gloves. What comes after the conjunction is not a complete sentence, so you would not add a comma. To check if at that place is a complete, contained clause, ask yourself, "Can that part stand by itself as a consummate sentence?" In the instance of the no comma example, gloves is what comes later the comma. That is non a consummate sentence, just a noun: that means it is office of a list and is not a consummate sentence = no comma. The indicate of these examples was to show you that you take to exist careful how you employ commas and conjunctions. As easy as it would exist to just ever toss in a comma, doing so would confuse your reader as what is and is not function of a listing and what ideas are joined. Option iii Your third choice is to join 2 independent clauses with a conjunctive adverb or another transition give-and-take. These words are very useful because they clearly bear witness your reader how you would like your ideas to connect. If you wanted to emphasize contrasting ideas, you would use on the other hand or notwithstanding. If you wanted to show crusade and issue, you could utilize as a result. Refer to the tables yous have seen in other chapters to make sure yous are using the transitions you actually hateful to be using; and so, check Tabular array 12.2 to ostend how you should punctuate it. Later on your start independent clause, you tin choose to either utilize a period or a semicolon, again depending on how much of a link you want to show. You may as well want to consider how many long sentences you lot have used prior to this. If yous use a lot of complicated sentences, y'all should probably utilize a period to allow your reader to take a intermission. You must also recollect to include a comma after the transition give-and-take.
Period:It is common cold outside. Therefore, I wore an actress warm coat.
Semicolon: It is cold outside; therefore, I wore an actress warm coat.
Joining Dependent Clauses
If one of the clauses in a judgement is contained and can stand on its own, just the other is not, you have to construct the judgement a lilliputian differently. Whenever you add a subordinating conjunction or relative pronoun to an independent sentence, yous create a dependent clause—one that can never stand up alone. In the examples beneath, notice that when the contained clause comes commencement, information technology is stiff plenty to carry the dependent clause at the end without whatsoever helping punctuation. However, if you lot want the dependent clause offset, you lot must add a comma betwixt it and the independent clause: the dependent clause is not strong plenty to support the independent clause after without a footling assist. In the examples beneath, the independent clauses are double underlined and the dependent clause has a unmarried underline.
IND first:I wore an actress warm coat as it is common cold exterior.
DEP showtime: As information technology is cold exterior, I wore an extra warm coat.
Tip
If you want to start a sentence with Because, you need to make certain there is a second one-half to that sentence that is contained. A Because (dependent) clause can never stand by itself.
At the bottom on Table 12.two, you tin see a list of v dependent markers that tin can be used a little differently. These are relative pronouns, and when you apply them, you lot need to enquire yourself if the information is 100 percent necessary for the reader to understand what you are describing. If information technology is optional, y'all can include a comma before the relative clause fifty-fifty if it comes later on the contained clause.
Non – essential:As it is cold outside, I wore an extra warm coat, which was blue.
Essential: My glaze which is blueish is the one I wear when information technology is really cold outside.
In the non – essential example, the fact that the coat was warm was probably more than important than that the glaze was blue. The information that the coat is blue probably would not make a difference in keeping the person warm, so the information in that relative clause is not terribly of import. Adding the comma before the clause tells the reader it is extra information. In the essential example, the utilize of the aforementioned clause without a preceding comma shows that this information is important. The author is implying he has other coats that are not as warm and are not blue, so he is emphasizing the importance of the blueish coat. These are the only 5 subordinators, or relative pronouns, for which yous can do this; every other one needs to follow the previous caption of how to use these dependent transition words. If you do decide to add together a comma with one of the relative pronouns, you need to think critically about whether or not that description is completely essential.
Using any of these sentence joining strategies is helpful in providing sentence diverseness to help your reader stay engaged and reading attentively. By post-obit these punctuation rules, you volition also avoid creating judgement fragments, run-on sentences, and comma splices, all of which improves your stop product.
Given how much piece of work you have put into your research paper, you will desire to check for whatever errors that could distract or confuse your readers. Using the spell checking feature in your word processing program tin can be helpful, it should not replace a full, careful review of your certificate. Exist certain to check for any errors that may accept come up ofttimes for you in the past. Employ Checklist 12.4: Editing Your Writing to help y'all every bit you edit.
Checklist 12.four : Editing Your Writing
Grammar
Are some sentences actually sentence fragments?
Are some sentences run-on? How tin can I right them?
Practice some sentences need conjunctions betwixt independent clauses?
Does every verb agree with its subject field?
Is every verb in the correct tense?
Are tense forms, peculiarly for irregular verbs, written correctly?
Have I used subject, object, and possessive personal pronouns correctly?
Have I usedwho andwhom correctly?
Is the ancestor of every pronoun clear?
Exercise all personal pronouns concur with their antecedents?
Have I used the correct comparative and top forms of adjectives and adverbs?
Is it articulate which word a participial phrase modifies, or is information technology a dangling modifier?
Sentence Construction
Are all my sentences uncomplicated sentences, or practise I vary my sentence structure?
Accept I chosen the best coordinating or subordinating conjunctions to join clauses?
Have I created long, overpacked sentences that should be shortened for clarity?
Do I come across any mistakes in parallel structure?
Punctuation
Does every judgement finish with the correct end punctuation?
Can I justify the apply of every exclamation indicate?
Have I used apostrophes correctly to write all singular and plural possessive forms?
Have I used quotation marks correctly?
Mechanics and Usage
Can I observe whatever spelling errors? How can I correct them?
Have I used capital letters where they are needed?
Have I written abbreviations, where immune, correctly?
Can I find any errors in the use of commonly confused words, such every bit to/too/two?
Tip
Exist careful about relying likewise much on spelling checkers and grammar checkers. A spelling checker cannot recognize that you meant to write principle simply wroteprincipal instead. A grammar checker often queries constructions that are perfectly correct. The program does not understand your meaning; information technology makes its check confronting a general set of formulas that might not use in each case. If yous use a grammar checker, accept the suggestions that make sense, simply consider why the suggestions came upwards.
Tip
Proofreading requires patience; it is very piece of cake to read past a mistake. Set up your paper aside for at to the lowest degree a few hours, if not a day or more, so your mind will residuum. Some professional proofreaders read a text backward so they can concentrate on spelling and punctuation. Some other helpful technique is to slowly read a paper aloud, paying attention to every give-and-take, letter, and punctuation mark.
If you demand additional proofreading aid, ask a reliable friend, classmate, or peer tutor to brand a final pass on your paper to look for anything you lot missed.
Formatting
Your finished assignment should exist properly formatted, post-obit the way required of you. Formatting includes the way of the title, margin size, folio number placement, location of the writer's proper noun, and other factors. Your instructor or section may require a specific style to exist used. The requirements may be more detailed and rigid for research projects and term papers, which often observe the American Psychological Clan (APA) way guide, especially when citations of sources are included.
To ensure the format is correct and follows whatever specific instructions, make a final check before you submit an assignment.
Self- practice EXERCISE 12.10
With the help of Checklist 12.iv, edit and proofread your essay.
Checking Citations and Formatting
When editing a research paper, it is also important to bank check that y'all have cited sources properly and formatted your certificate according to the specified guidelines. There are 2 reasons for this. First, citing sources correctly ensures that yous give proper credit to other people for ideas and information that helped you in your work. Second, using right formatting establishes your paper every bit 1 student'due south contribution to the work adult by and for a larger academic customs. Increasingly, American Psychological Clan (APA) mode guidelines are the standard for many academic fields. Use Checklist 12.v: Citations and Formatting to assistance.
Checklist 12.5 : Citations and Formatting
Inside the body of my newspaper, each fact or idea taken from a source is credited to the correct source.
Each in-text citation includes the source author'south proper noun (or, where applicable, the organization name or source championship) and yr of publication. I have used the correct format of in text and parenthetical citations.
Each source cited in the body of my paper has a corresponding entry in the references section of my paper.
My references section includes a heading and double-spaced alphabetized entries.
Each entry in my references section is indented on the 2nd line and all subsequent lines.
Each entry in my references department includes all the necessary data for that source type, in the correct sequence and format.
My newspaper includes a championship page.
My newspaper includes a running head.
The margins of my paper are set at 1 inch. Text is double spaced and set in a standard 12-bespeak font.
For detailed guidelines on APA citation and formatting, seeAffiliate 9: Citations and Referencing.
Writing at Work
Post-obit APA commendation and formatting guidelines may require time and effort. However, it is expert practice for learning how to follow accepted conventions in any professional field. Many large corporations create a manner manual with guidelines for editing and formatting documents produced by that corporation. Employees follow the mode transmission when creating internal documents and documents for publication.
During the process of revising and editing, Jorge made changes in the content and style of his newspaper. He also gave the newspaper a last review to cheque for overall definiteness and, particularly, right APA citations and formatting. Read the final draft of his newspaper.
With the help of Checklist 12.five, edit and proofread your essay.
Although you probably practise non want to look at your paper again before you submit it to your instructor, take the fourth dimension to practice a final check. Since you have already worked through all of the checklists higher up focusing on certain aspects at once, working through one final checklist should confirm you lot accept written a strong, persuasive essay and that everything is the way you desire information technology to be. As extra insurance yous have produced a strong newspaper, you may fifty-fifty want someone else to double-bank check your essay using C hecklist 12.6: Final Revision. So y'all can compare to come across how your perceptions of your newspaper friction match those of someone else, essentially having that person act every bit the one who will exist grading your paper.
Checklist 12.half-dozen: Final Revision
Offset Revision 1 : Organization | |
___ | Practise you show you lot understand the consignment: purpose, audience, and genre? |
___ | Focus: Have yous clearly stated your thesis (your controlling idea) in the first paragraph? |
___ | Does your thesis statement catch the reader's attention? |
___ | Unity: Write your opening and closing paragraphs and place each topic judgement in between. You should take a "mini essay" with several unlike main points supporting your thesis. |
___ | Are your paragraphs organized in a logical fashion? |
___ ___ | Does each topic sentence (per paragraph) logically follow the one preceding it? |
Exercise you have several points to support your thesis? | |
___ ___ ___ | Bank check whether your paragraphs are organized according to a specific pattern. |
Would rearranging your paragraphs support your thesis better? | |
Have you lot provided a comprehensive conclusion to your essay? Does it summarize your master points (using dissimilar words)? | |
Starting time Revision ii : Paragraphs and Sentences | |
___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ ___ | Does each paragraph have main points and supporting details? |
Does each paragraph accept only one chief betoken? | |
Is your approach or pattern used to develop your paragraph's main indicate followed? | |
Cheque that each judgement is relevant to the primary point of the paragraph. | |
Are there several sentences giving details, facts, quotes, reasons, and arguments in each paragraph? | |
Is each supporting detail specific, concrete, and relevant to the topic sentence? | |
Does each sentence logically follow the preceding ane? | |
Have you used transitional words to help the reader follow your thoughts? If not, add them. | |
Paragraph length: If too short, develop further. If too long, intermission into smaller paragraphs or consolidate some sentences. | |
Check your essay for tone and point of view. | |
Second Revision 1 : Sentences and Usage | |
___ ___ ___ ___ | Confirm that each judgement has a subject and a verb. |
Revise fragments, splices, and run-on sentences. | |
Check modifiers to encounter if they have been put in unclear places. | |
Do y'all have a variety of sentence structures? (simple and complex) | |
___ ___ ___ ___ ___ | Scan for subject-verb agreement in each sentence. |
Are you consistent with your verb tenses? Check to brand sure at that place are not any confusing or irrelevant tense changes. | |
Make certain that words in lists are in parallel forms. | |
Recollect through your pronouns; what is each one referring to? | |
Check for confusing "person" shifts within paragraphs. Go along the subjects consequent. | |
___ ___ ___ ___ ___ | Identify all verbs and change any that are passive to active. |
Utilize potent verbs not weak adverbs. Say something "is" not that it "may be." | |
Check for wordiness. | |
Browse to make sure you have not used the same word repeatedly in the aforementioned sentence and paragraph. Use a thesaurus. | |
Expect for and eliminate clichés. | |
Second Revision two : Documentation | |
___ ___ ___ ___ | Have you documented all your references? |
Accept yous used in text citations every fourth dimension they were needed? Take you formatted all your citations correctly? | |
Is your references' section consummate and correct according to the JIBC APA Way Guide. | |
Second Revision 3 : Mechanics | |
___ ___ | Check that all words and sentences are punctuated according to standard usage. |
Check for spelling and typographical errors. | |
Tertiary Revision: Content | |
___ ___ ___ ___ | Read your essay aloud. Practise you believe what you lot take written? |
At this point do you lot develop your controlling idea in a way that makes sense? | |
Have you provided enough background information? Is information technology relevant/necessary? | |
Have yous primarily used paraphrasing every bit opposed to straight quotations? | |
You should at present be confident yous take produced a strong statement that is wonderfully constructed and that you will exist able to persuade your audience that your points and indicate of view are valid.
Key Takeaways
- During revising, you add together, cutting, motion, or modify information in club to meliorate content.
- During editing, you lot take a second look at the words and sentences yous used to express your ideas and fix any problems in grammar, punctuation, and sentence structure.
- Recollect to budget time for careful editing and proofreading. Employ all available resources, including editing checklists, peer editing, and your establishment's writing lab, to meliorate your editing skills.
- Organization in a inquiry paper means that the argument proceeds logically from the introduction to the trunk to the decision. It flows logically from one point to the next. When revising a research newspaper, evaluate the organization of the paper equally a whole and the organization of private paragraphs.
- In a cohesive research paper, the elements of the paper work together smoothly and naturally. When revising a research paper, evaluate its cohesion. In particular, check that information from research is smoothly integrated with your ideas.
- An effective research newspaper uses a style and tone that are accordingly academic and serious. When revising a research paper, check that the style and tone are consistent throughout.
- Editing a research paper involves checking for errors in grammar, mechanics, punctuation, usage, spelling, citations, and formatting.
Source: https://opentextbc.ca/writingforsuccess/chapter/chapter-12-peer-review-and-final-revisions/
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